There is not a doubt in my mind that one of my favorite people walking this earth is Sarah Loebner. She is a very special woman who has a heavenly voice when she sings, a PA in this diabetes world and a person who has overcome so much to be where she is in life. Her smile is electric and her personality matches it’s brilliance. The bronze statue
“Fearless Little Girl” was not based on her, but it could have been. As well as many others including my own daughter. Hard to believe she wrote this over 10 years ago, harder still is to realize how pertinent it is, still, all these years later……so here it is. Thank you my DEAR FRIEND……feel free to share and pass it along!
IT’S NOT NOVEMBER, BUT I STILL HAVE SOME DIABETES AWARENESS TO SHARE WITH YOU! READ ON:
Miss Manners recently received a question from a person with diabetes regarding his checking his blood sugar in public, wondering if it was rude to prick his finger in front of other people. Miss Pretty-Poor-Manners proceeded to tell him that he should move his diabetes care into the bathroom. Here are a couple reasons why that seems like a completely wrong answer to me:
First of all, I understand that there are people out there who are squeamish when it comes to blood. Seriously, I get it: I cry every time I get my blood drawn because LKA;LJFKNS;IREOHAU;4WERUGHILWAHW;RGESDF, you know? I’m on that level. But checking my blood sugar requires a drop of blood LITERALLY the size of the head of a pin. You legitimately have to /squint/ to see it. If you don’t like blood, don’t get all up in my business staring at my finger trying to get a good look at something you seriously don’t want to see! I’m not an absurd person looking to make you uncomfortable, I won’t wave it in your face! I’ve never met a person with diabetes who asks people to watch them check their blood sugar/take insulin unless they’re engaged in a consensual teaching moment (side note: always feel free to ask me if you want to watch!). We just do what we need to do when we need to do it, and often that involves checking our blood sugar/taking a shot/pressing buttons on our pumps at the dinner table, in the movie theater, waiting in line for coffee, you name a place, we’ve checked our blood sugar there. And we do it so often and we’re SO GOOD AT IT that it never takes more than a minute (but that’s generous) to whip out the essentials, get ‘er done, and put everything away. For this woman to imply that my checking my blood sugar in public is going to disturb someone in my vicinity so profoundly that I need to relocate my diabetes care is pretty laughable. If someone IS so profoundly bothered by my discreet but public diabetes care, maybe it’s THEIR manners that need some adjusting.
Secondly, to usher me into a public bathroom to take care of myself only promotes shame, embarrassment, and discomfort regarding my diabetes. And those are not things I want to feel, for obvious I-like-to-be-happy reasons, but also because if I become uncomfortable with my diabetes, the people around me will surely be uncomfortable with it too. My one hope is that all of my friends, family, and even strangers feel safe and comfortable asking me questions when they’re confused about something they see or are genuinely curious about my life with diabetes; ignorance can only be combatted with openness and education. If I’m running away to the bathroom to check my blood sugar, then they won’t want to ask me questions at the dinner table where I’m more than happy to talk to them about it. It’s safer for the people around me to know what it looks like when I check my blood sugar and take insulin; what if someday they can use that familiarity to save someone’s life? I have no reason to hide, and /every/ reason not to.
Thirdly, BATHROOMS ARE GROSS, I don’t even like going to the bathroom in most bathrooms, so you probably won’t find me dealing with my sterile diabetes supplies in there. And no thanks for the suggestion.
TL;DR I won’t take my diabetes care into a bathroom instead of dealing with it at the dinner table/on a plane/anywhere in public because it’s totally unnecessary for me to hide what keeps me alive (especially when it’s not even a big deal), and if I were to hide it, people with honest intentions to learn about my diabetes would be less likely to ask me what’s on their mind.
GENERAL NOTE TO ANYONE WHO KNOWS ME (AND I GUESS PEOPLE WHO DON’T, THOUGH WE’RE PROBABLY NOT FACEBOOK FRIENDS): I will check my blood sugar in front of you. I won’t apologize, because it’s nothing to be sorry about. If you EVER have a question about my diabetes, please ask. Even if you think it’s weird. If it’s too weird, I probably won’t answer it, but I will thank you for being interested in an important part of my life. If you ever want me to teach you about anything specific and/or hands-on, let me know, I will ALWAYS make time for that. Because diabetes is a part of me, and I want you to know that part of me just as well as you know the part that can’t stop thinking about hugs and puppies and also puppies.
Thanks for reading! I’m attaching the link to the offensive Miss Manners article in case you haven’t had enough opportunities to say “ughhhhh,” “no, just, no,” or “blechhhhh stop talking” today: http://www.donotlink.com/dSH
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Tagged diabetes, diabetes dad, diabetes inspiration