In each household there is the one person who completely understands the warning signs of a ‘low’ or a ‘high’ blood sugar other than the person who has diabetes (and sometimes, rarely as far as I’m aware, there are more than one). I surely hope there is at least one.
Make no mistake about it; in our household it’s Jill. It’s almost as if she has a sixth sense. I can see it but by time I notice it, Jill would already be treating it with whatever is needed. It has always been like that and it’s my understanding that it’s like that in many other households.
BUT………
Our kids will grow up and one day leave us.
What happens then? The thought of it makes me feel as if I am coming to an edge of a cliff. Hold on? Jump? Let go? What?
Now I am not referring to those who are leaving for school and THAT is an important issue but today I am referring to spouse, partner, and/or roommate. Will they know what to do? Will they know what to look for? Will we trust that they will know? Is it that we can’t stop it so we just have to accept it? And most important, to they know just how important their job is in all of this?
Quite frankly do we think anyone will be good enough to take care of our kids? I mean I get it when it comes to security, safety, financially, but this diabetes-you-better-take-care-of-my-kids-and you-better-know-what-the-heck-is-going-on is a realization I’m trying to come to grips with more and more as my two kids with diabetes grow older.
Probably more so with my oldest (who does not have diabetes) son now getting married, I have faced that I will go through this two more times. After the anxiety attack set in; and I think about when the time comes, I guess I must come to grips with the fact that Kaitlyn and Rob will know the person they choose to marry.
I’m not an easily trusting person when it comes to this point and I certainly will not speak for Jill, but how do we know? Do we need to know? I’m very interested to hear from those who have gone through this? I’m also interested in what you feel having kids with diabetes who will one day inform us that they are ‘moving out’? And finally do those who are now adults with T1 I ask, was this even a thought in your dating process? Please reply here as it is a subject I know could interest many.
Here comes that anxiety again. Let me know your thoughts, I need to take a walk.
I am a diabetes dad.
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8 replies on “A Fast Approaching Cliff……..Who Will Take Care of Them??????”
Its funny when my husband went spoke to my dad to ask for my hand in marriage my dad didnt have the whole “my daughter is special and i want her to be happy talk” his talk went something like you do know noor is diabetic you better be ready to take care of her and support her stay healthy..thank god i got lucky with him hes always involved and generally knows when im low, but sometimes likes to blame my anger during a fight to lows (not always the case)..but ya i understand your concern as a parent i know my parents were terrified. Dont worry you raised them all right and they are good kids who will survive it all.
Thank u Noor for your great insight and wisdom.
This is my greatest fear as I had a colleague before I knew much about T1 die from a low after a stress divorce. I am thankful this is still a little way away for us.
This is my greatest fear as I had a colleague before I knew much about T1 die from a low after a stress divorce. I am thankful this is still a little way away for us. But it will be here in possible a year for roomate.
As well as being a dad of an 8 year old diabetic boy and a 9 year that has the antibodies for diabetes, I am also a lifetime type 1 diabetic myself.
I have always been very rebellious and undisciplined in my diabetes care. I have traveled Europe in college, or my drug/alcohol experimental phase, as I look back in shock and awe. In those times I found myself lost in cities without speaking the local language, without insulin or money to save myself. People that knew me back then are always shocked to see me alive today. Seizures have been a part of my life. Not many, but nonetheless present.
The one thing I can say to help is that we are not islands. We are community people and anyone we surround ourselves with should be informed of what needs to be done in the “tough” times. (that being low blood sugar for us diabetics).
Which ever child of mine is out there in the world, the one thing that does scare me is them being alone, with or without diabetes. With friends they will always be cared for in the “tough” times. I once had to carry an epileptic girl having a seizure through Amsterdam. I didn’t know I could care for someone like that. It comes natural for us as human beings to help our friends when they need it.
Don’t worry, our kids are stronger, smarter and better equipped for this world today than we are today.
My son is 22 and I am NOT ready for him to move out. I am always here for him and know how to take care of him when he is “diabetes sick” as we say in our home. His friends and girlfriend don’t really “get it” and it scares me to death to think of him not living with me.
I am a single mom and I have always been the one who knows him and his disease best. Honestly I don’t trust anyone to help him better than I can. This is a tough one Tom !!!
Growing up with a parent who was diabetic and a younger sister, it’s always been normal. When I moved out for uni I told 2 of my flat mates that I was diabetic but kept supplies in my room. Then when I lived with friends in my 2nd and 3rd years I was very active, not pumping and had some very spectacular hypos! Then I moved home and hated it! So I lived on my own for two years but had a morning routine that I followed with my parents. Weekdays I needed to check in by 7am, weekends 9am even just a text hello was fine. Then I started dating my fiancée and he has been aware of my diabetes from the start, first date stabbed myself with a needle at the table to cover my food. So I go for relax, your kids probably do know what they are doing, you can’t protect them forever 🙂 and I think you’ll find after a couple of episodes on their own they will quickly learn plus most friends pick up on more than you think!!! Just because its not the first thought in a girlfriends/boyfriends mind doesn’t mean it isn’t there!!