diabetes help – DiabetesDad

OMG….Your Number is What…..What Did You Do??????!!!!!

Posted on July 17, 2013 | by tomkarlya | 7 Comments

Is that the phrase you might have used when your child walks in the door and informs you of their meter reading?

In as much as they may or may not comply during the last few hours which made them spike or drop; someone taught me something a long time ago that we try to adhere to as much as possible; just say thank you and ask them the next steps that should be taken to get back on track.

If we understand that the numbers we see are the gauge they are supposed to be to help manage diabetes; why do we as parents show our face of disappointment. Our kids will read that same face as their failure.

Remember that the next time you want to scream out the window. It is not your child’s fault they have diabetes and i know you know that but make sure your face and voice do not say something else.

Just a reminder because I surely needed one today. 🙂

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’.

Sometimes a Princess (or Prince) is Right Next to Us.

Posted on July 16, 2013 | by tomkarlya | 1 Comment

I know some very special people.

I hate diabetes and everything about it. The journey, though, has allowed us the honor to have crossed paths with some of the most incredible people in the world. People who care. People who give. And quite frankly, people who love.

These people understand diabetes. Some volunteer their time. Some are involved professionally. Some do both. They are doers, not merely those who talk the talk; they definitely walk the walk.

They have but one goal; so the people who have diabetes, or a loved one with diabetes, are given the same opportunity as everyone else to gain everything they can out of life. They learn and share; they share and make people laugh; they care and make people think.

They challenge those who have diabetes in their household to stretch one more foot to get the ‘upper-hand’ on diabetes. Their hearts are as big and as full of gold as there can be.

They just do.

The problem with my week at CWD is I had to say goodbye to so many of them. Back home we all have the one, two, and/or three special people who really help us in this journey but for a whole week I was with about 250 (that is correct, 250). Every place I turned, someone else giving their time, their expertise, their smile to someone else.

In the picture is Mary. Mary is just the perfect person to represent the attitude of so many
who try their hardest to make a difference every day. Whether someone has diabetes or has a sibling with diabetes, has a child with diabetes, or even has diabetes; so many choose to help. Mary, like so many, are tops in their field with degrees and experience beyond comprehension.

What says it all is what Mary has written in her bio when she is at CWD, You can spot her at the conferences-she’s the one with the trail of kids behind her!

No matter where you are; be very appreciative of those people who give—-we would be lost without them.

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’.

When You Need Help…..Who Helps You?

Posted on May 3, 2013 | by tomkarlya | 4 Comments

As I read various posts, I rarely see or hear about what a spouse/partner does in the management of a child’s diabetes.

Let’s face it, sometimes you want to pull your hair out trying to find help but who DOES help you when you need it?

I write often and at her request, I mention Jill rarely in my writings, but let there be no mistake about it; my kids are alive today because of the amount of work their mother puts into this world of diabetes.

Back when Kaitlyn was first diagnosed and we discussed and decided that I would be the one to work and Jill would leave her job to care for Kaitlyn; we had a great foundation for which to move forward.

We discussed and agreed.

I did not know it at the time but the fact that we discussed, and it was not just ‘assumed’ who-would-do-what, began a healthy foundation for much of the care for our kids. Now I’m not saying there were not challenges, any marriage has challenges, but when it came to the care of our kids we learned that discussions needed to be crucial for us to understand our roles and also the role of diabetes in our new normal.

There was a mutual respect for the fact that I knew Jill had it no easier than I, and in fact, probably tougher. It takes a lot to jab your child a million times and watch every step they take at home, at school, and in life. No one I know is better at this, than Jill. When I could, I would take the kids and try to get her some space, but her efforts were herculean since day one.

It was difficult to work 16 hour days seven days a week for as long as I did but somehow we made it work. On many occasions I would come home and find that Jill fell asleep with all sorts of diabetes information all around her. It was never enough to ‘just do’, it was always about educating ourselves on what was new.

As many of you know, there is a look that glazes over our kids when a hypo/hyper creeps into their active lives; Jill could, and still can, spot it a mile away. She still reads up on what is new and what is coming and shares that with Kaitlyn (and now Rob also).

I have always stated that I have it easy compared to all that she has done and continues to do. I know that many ‘go it alone’ and you have tremendous respect from those who know what you are up against. Hopefully everyone has at least one person to help even if a spouse/partner is no longer present. Who do you turn to when you need a break or to those who have help, kindly share how you ‘divide up’ the day-to-day management of diabetes in your household.

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’

A Fast Approaching Cliff……..Who Will Take Care of Them??????

Posted on March 22, 2013 | by tomkarlya | 8 Comments

In each household there is the one person who completely understands the warning signs of a ‘low’ or a ‘high’ blood sugar other than the person who has diabetes (and sometimes, rarely as far as I’m aware, there are more than one). I surely hope there is at least one.

Make no mistake about it; in our household it’s Jill. It’s almost as if she has a sixth sense. I can see it but by time I notice it, Jill would already be treating it with whatever is needed. It has always been like that and it’s my understanding that it’s like that in many other households.

BUT………

Our kids will grow up and one day leave us.

What happens then? The thought of it makes me feel as if I am coming to an edge of a cliff. Hold on? Jump? Let go? What?

Now I am not referring to those who are leaving for school and THAT is an important issue but today I am referring to spouse, partner, and/or roommate. Will they know what to do? Will they know what to look for? Will we trust that they will know? Is it that we can’t stop it so we just have to accept it? And most important, to they know just how important their job is in all of this?

Quite frankly do we think anyone will be good enough to take care of our kids? I mean I get it when it comes to security, safety, financially, but this diabetes-you-better-take-care-of-my-kids-and you-better-know-what-the-heck-is-going-on is a realization I’m trying to come to grips with more and more as my two kids with diabetes grow older.

Probably more so with my oldest (who does not have diabetes) son now getting married, I have faced that I will go through this two more times. After the anxiety attack set in; and I think about when the time comes, I guess I must come to grips with the fact that Kaitlyn and Rob will know the person they choose to marry.

I’m not an easily trusting person when it comes to this point and I certainly will not speak for Jill, but how do we know? Do we need to know? I’m very interested to hear from those who have gone through this? I’m also interested in what you feel having kids with diabetes who will one day inform us that they are ‘moving out’? And finally do those who are now adults with T1 I ask, was this even a thought in your dating process? Please reply here as it is a subject I know could interest many.

Here comes that anxiety again. Let me know your thoughts, I need to take a walk.

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’

PLEASE Let These Wonderful People Know How Grateful we, as a Diabetes Community, are for their Efforts!!!!!!!

Posted on February 18, 2013 | by tomkarlya | 15 Comments

Welcome. Here is your ticket to enter a fabulous world. I am absolutely exhausted. I am absolutely exhilarated. I am absolutely thrilled. For the past few months, we Suffolk County LIONs Diabetes Education Foundation members have been working on a project to raise money to do what we do to help people with diabetes.

Yesterday we held our inaugural Dancing for Diabetes at the beautiful Patchogue Theatre for the Performing Arts.

The brain child of LION Frank Compoccio was to have Dance Schools perform all day long in groups of around five schools each, that way we would have dancers all day long. Interesting concept; would it work?

Well it worked indeed and over 25 schools participated along with 600 dancers of every age from 8 on up. Fabulous. These dancers were as good as you can get and as professional as one could hope. They volunteered their time; they danced; their parents donated and over a thousand people came. Over $22,000 was raised from the event—-JUST FABULOUS.

They sold tickets and when that was not enough they donated checks from their own school as pictured here.

As a parent of two children with diabetes, I was so moved by the professionalism, the spirit, and the willingness to help by all of the attendees.

Frank knew so many people in the ‘business of dance’ and they all volunteered their time. For my loved ones with diabetes, and for yours. JUST Amazing. Frank was fabulous.

Frank gave plaques to every school and certificates to every dancer….he said he wanted this event to be run professionally and it was. Here he thanks his fabulous crew who all volunteered for over 12 hours on the day of the event….so much more preparing

We do what we do for our loved ones because we do. People who do not have that personal connection and their love and support; well that will humble us to our knees. Enjoy seeing how so many helped our loved ones.

Thank you to everyone who helped and participate; the Dance Schools, the parents, those WONDERFUL DANCERS, and the Suffolk County LIONs Diabetes Education Foundation. On this day you made a difference and we, the DIabetes Community thank you from the bottom of our grateful hearts.

Enjoy some GREAT shots of the day.

These young ladies performed an incredibly moving
tribute to our fallen firemen

Very unique tribute to ‘a few elders’.

Faces of young dancers ready to go!!!!

They were as graceful…………

As they were dedicated to helping those with diabetes.

So many Volunteered their time.

And they kept dancing, and dancing.

Thank you all.
I am a GRATEFUL Diabetes dad.

What is Your Question?????……the DOC is Here to Help.

Posted on December 8, 2012 | by tomkarlya | 1 Comment

The last week has taught me a very valuable lesson. So many people responded to the questions I asked and many more parents were grateful for the input.

We, as parents, have an incredible resource available to us. As I read many private and public replies, emails, and private messages I have learned that many parents have questions and do not want to be public with their questions.

I know that there are so many in the DOC (Diabetes Online Community) who want to help because their experiences have been there. SO here is what I am proposing. If you have any question that you would like to see addressed, no topic is off limit, email me at tkarlya@drif.org.

At different times I will post the question for people to reply via my blog. Now that means you will have to trust me to keep your name distant from the question and confidential; I can assure you that those who know me will let you know that I can keep that to myself. My only interest is in helping.

Also know that these answers will help to only guide you, medical questions MUST BE ANSWERED by those who are professional and in the know….this is a guide on what others have done to solve what yo may be facing now.

WHO has the problem is nowhere near important as helping solve the problem…..you will have to trust me on this. So if you have a question, email me and at different times I will get it out to the DOC. In the subject like just write the words ‘a question’.

We will try to get to as many as we can but the SOC is a fabulous resource—-it should be used and sometimes anonymity is what is needed, and I will be glad to be the go-between and help get your questions answered without letting any personal information get out.

Let’s help each other.

I am a diabetes dad.