Do they know, and when they became older, did/do they realize;
…..when we ran out on the soccer field it was because we knew they were low, not to embarrass them?
…..that we were a fashion plate at one time and could carry small clutch pocketbooks with the best of them, but we needed the bigger bag because supplies were more important than fashion?
…..that our bedroom door did not always remain opened throughout the night, it was done so if you needed us, you could always get in; and so we could hear ‘that thing’ that made us know we needed to react….that was more important than intimacy between a man and a woman (we just happen to be your mom and dad)?
…..that the times you were mortified when we pulled out a portion plate, a pack of syringes, lancets, a carb scale, or our calorie king book; it was because you were more important than how we looked to anyone else who would have no idea what this ‘stuff’ meant to your well-being?
…..that there was a time we could look great enough and walk with enough confidence to turn heads more than you will ever know, even in the morning; but the many all-nighters to get your blood sugar in range just made us too tired to care and just waking up to get you and the rest of the family to school was enough?
…..that we are the biggest sports fan alive but our night-out with our friends became the one night we could give our spouse a break to ‘get out’ for one day, and that became more important?
…..that the strong and smiling face encouraging you that you can do anything with diabetes crashed down on us at night and we cried ourselves to sleep worrying, hoping, and more importantly; going over the day, step-by-step, in our heads so we could improve your life a little bit more in the morning, and this was done EVERY night?
…..that all of the ‘asking to stay in touch’ with us while you were out was not to keep you ‘tied to the apron strings’ but just so we could go back to what was left of whatever daily business we had, knowing you were okay?
We did these things because we are your parents. We do not know what it is like to have diabetes and we have made that clear to you and relayed what a hero we know you are but in the midst of that, never forget that you have no idea what it is (or was) to have a child with diabetes (or any disease) unless, MAY HEAVEN forbid, you have one. The one time you will feel helpless over your child’s flu or a broken bone, multiply that by a million and you might get close to how we felt…..always.
This is not a complaint, we love you. We want you to have everything. We did what we had to for your benefit and to balance as best a life for an entire family as we could but know this; getting from one point to another point in life did not ‘just’ happen. It happened with absolute careful planning (and a whole lotta luck). Parents in any walk of life make sacrifices for their children; that is a given. We did not know what we were doing when diabetes entered our household, and others were probably much better at it, but we learned the best way we knew how.
Where you are in life right now; well that was no accident. Just wanted you to know.
If you are out there and think you need to let your mom and dad know that you appreciated all they did……..call them and let them know.
Realize that mom and dad; is only ONE word to describe who we are. Think about it.
I am a diabetes dad.
Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’
4 replies on “Our Children Have No Clue……..And as Parents, Achieving that Was/Is Our Measure of Success!”
In tears. This is beautiful. Thank you for saying what so many of us think and feel, and saying it often enough that we know we are not alone.
Beautifully written, and like Paula, I’m teary. This is just what I needed – thank you.
I crept into the bedroom of my 10 year old boy, dx at age 6, to check his BG one night. I was successful in getting the BG taken without waking him, or so I thought, until I heard him say “Thanks Mom”
No thanks necessary, but so sweet to hear it.
what a quick but wonderful story….truly. Thanks for sharing.