A Letter: PLEASE Come Back…….You are so MISSED!!!!!

I miss youDear September 25th, 1992,

Hi there.

I guess you are a bit surprised to hear from me.  It’s been a long time I know.  I have been thinking of you a lot lately.  There is no easy way to say this and I need to be honest.

I miss you.

Things were always a little crazy in our house, I had my sites on some interesting things for our future.  You were the last day that anything resembling normalcy was part of our lives. 

You were my last day of normalcy events as I knew them.

I know you do not want to hear my woes and I won’t go into every last detail but September 26th, 1992 was the day diabetes dropped in at our house, unannounced may I add, and just stayed.  No matter how hard we tried….it just stayed.  It was unfair and still is unfair.  You, you were the last time when everything was okay.

At that time, there were hospital stays, doctors poking, there was much to know, much to learn, and tears; way too many tears.  I’m sorry to burden you with all of this but surely you can find a way to come back into our lives.  I know you have come and gone, and that is the way it works, but if there is any possible way, PLEASE try to come back into our lives.

We need you.  We want you.  If we hurt you, we are so sorry and want you back.

And if you cannot come back in, could you please speak to your friend and colleague March 19th, 2009—-that is the last day before diabetes came again to our house and if I cannot have both dates back again, and I cannot have you; I will surely settle for this date back instead.

Just wanted you to know how much we miss what it was like; as it was on that date.  Wanted you to know how much you were missed.

Please consider it.  Much Love always;

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’.

4 replies on “A Letter: PLEASE Come Back…….You are so MISSED!!!!!”

Hi Tom! I read most of what you post, and have not commented before now. What you write is always thought provoking and educating, and I thought this a good topic to share my thoughts. My daughter was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes on October 10, 2002. While I hate that she has diabetes, and the intrusion that it often is, I am not sure that I would wish that time back. She has grown so much in the time that has passed–has had adventures that surely would not have been possible without that diagnosis. She has always been an independent sort, and that has stood her very well in her journey with diabetes. She is now a beautiful 22 year old college student, living away from home for now (and has been since August of 2011). She has been a junior counselor at a diabetes summer camp, went to Arizona on a trip with staff from that same camp. She has learned to manage her own diabetes and life with ease and confidence. We told her at diagnosis that having diabetes does not change WHO you are, it just changes HOW you take care of yourself. We never let her feel sorry for herself, never let others “cater” to her, never told her she couldn’t do something because she had diabetes. Our philosophy has always been, ” I did not give birth to diabetes and call it Carol. I gave birth to Carol, and she just happens to have diabetes. What she does with that is up to her.” My goal and dream for Carol has always been the same for her as for her older brother who does not have diabetes–to live life to the fullest every day, to go for your dreams, to be the best person you can be, to be the person God created you to be. Yes, she has to figure her diabetes into the mix, but so do people with asthma, cerebral palsy, etc. We have never allowed blood sugar issues to be an excuse for bad behavior. We would check the blood sugar, treat that as necessary and then discipline for the behavior. Most people don’t know Carol has diabetes, and that is her choice. As she has said, “it is only a part of who I am, and not a part that should influence how people feel about me.” She has 3 WONDERFUL room-mates at college–I prayed for GOOD room-mates, GOD gave her the BEST room-mates. She will be moving home in May to finish her schooling here–not because of issues with her diabetes, but because her room-mates are graduating and she doesn’t want to break in new room-mates for one year. She has chosen Sociology as her major in college and will be serving an internship when she gets home. Her diabetes gives her a unique perspective and a special empathy for others. I can not wait to see how God uses my girl AND her diabetes to reach out to others and be an influence in lives. She is my hero and an inspiration to me daily.
My name is Debi Qualls–and I am a diabetes mom (one among many!)

Thank you for your kind words Tom! I have been inspired by the many who have started this journey long before Carol and I did. We have met some of them, many of them are “facebook friends”. I have been encouraged by the advancements made that allow our children to live a life with diabetes as normally as they choose to live it.

Thank you for being on the forefront of diabetes, keeping it a priority to find a cure. My understanding is that you chose to put your acting career on the back burner to be a full time advocate, first for your daughter and then for your son. The moms and dads who have gone before me are my heroes, they have inspired and encouraged me more than I can say.
Thank you again Tom–for being a dad involved, for being a diabetes dad!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *