It happens. In all sorts of varying degrees, but at some time or another our children will decide that they do not want diabetes anymore. More than just ‘not want it’, they will decide that they do not want to do anything to take care of it.
In some it is for a day or so. Some it so much more.
It can happen at anytime, really, but it seems to me that many times it happens during the teen years. There is a time when they just turn off. They do not take their shots, check their blood sugar, eat right, and they can get pretty nasty toward life and everyone around them.
It is our job to keep a check on how much this thought process is impacting their life and there are many courses of action that can be taken and should be taken. My friend Joe tells us (who has T1 for over 50 years) that everyone needs a break, Every now and again it is okay to just do the minimum so the brain can take a little rest. Let them kick back a bit.
Some who have experienced an all out melt down will have their endo inform the child that they should speak to someone. Someone who specializes in diabetes and the psyche of living with it. At some point it may be worth while for your child to have someone to speak to that is not you. And it might be just a tad easier if it comes ‘officially’ from your endo. Let your endo know what is happening and seek their advice on next steps and who, possibly, your child may speak.
There are many facets to diabetes and living with it. It’s never easy. It is at certain points that it must really be about giving them choices and others when a course of action must be considered.
I tell you this from someone who knows nothing about living with diabetes because I do not have it. THAT is the most important lesson I have learned in all my years. Trying to explain to a child something we do not understand, and THEY KNOW we do not understand is a huge part of the battle. Find someone who can talk to them. Someone who can set them correctly because they have been there.
There is help out there and the most important thing we can do as parents is keep seeking it until the problem is resolved. Please share what you have done when your child just decides ‘not today’ or ‘no more’. It can be extremely frustrating and we feel so helpless.
Share any tidbits you may have also. Others could use the help.
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0 thoughts on “Has Your Child Ever Had ‘Diabetes Meltdown’??????”
Jeanette Collier says:
About twice a year my 13 yo son had a “I’m sick of this” day. I back off of my “back seat driver” role of testing, etc. & just leave him alone. By the next day, he’s usually come to terms with it. I cannot imagine having that much responsibility for life & death situations every single day at that age. These young people are truly inspirational.
Thank you for your words from someone ‘in the trenches’—love the phrase ‘back seat driver’—-is that what we are? Yes, I guess so. We sure must get annoying at times. Still looking for the perfect parent manual…..if I find it, I’ll let you know.
Brunella Glasser says:
This made me tear up a bit… My 9 yo daughter had those days too. They’re fa in between but they are there. They are truly inspirational people and what they go through on a daily basis is unfadable to me… Just continue to pray my sets of 5 yo twin girls don’t have T1 as well. Thanks for this support system. Glad I found you guys.
It is my hope that you continue to increase your knowledge and continue the care needed—not for them to survive; but to thrive. It is a big a world out there and as my daughter stated when she was the same age as yours 15 years ago……”I have diabetes, diabetes is not who I am.” I never forgot that line and I never will.
She says Diabetes is part of who she is but not who she is. ;). This 9 yo has a great head on her shoulders! I’m truly blessed.
Yes you are…..and so are we that we have had a chance to know a little about her…..thanks for sharing.
I’m scared of the teen years. o.O He’s only 9. It’s coming. I know it is. I hope I’m ready when it does.
I was just compelled to write—-do not be scared….be prepared. CWD FFL, Camps, education…..all we can do is learn all we can…….and hope & pray.
Actually, I consider us some of the lucky few, as we have a truly amazing support team between parents, grandparents, doctors, C.D.E.’s, and fellow T1D families. My son, actually, had one of those days yesterday – long after I had posted here. He told me he “hates his life” and he “doesn’t want it anymore” (it being T1D). This because the subject came up of having to take him for blood work again. He hates blood work; as opposed to my other son who never minded shots or blood work or anything like that. Figures the kid who is scared of needles is the one who ends up with T1D. 😛
…Anyway – yes. I do, actually, feel blessed with the people around me with respect to T1D – present company included.
Well thank you….
There is nothing like a strong support team….and sometimes form the most unlikeliest of places. I will never forget the call we received from Kaitlyn’s school nurse who asked if she could ‘go one’ the insulin pump (with saline of course) so she would know what it was like. (and she did it.)
People; some can truly touch your heart….right?
Thanks for writing..
Our CDE told us during the first classes that this is “her disease, not yours. The best thing you can do is give it back to her. You’ve been dealing with it for 2 days. She will deal with it for the rest of her life.” I have always kept those words in my head if she decides to have a “pity party day.” My T1 daughter is only 10 (and just passed the 5 year diagnosis mark) but when those days come, we talk (a lot) and it’s STRAIGHT TALK. ‘Yes, T1 stinks. You’re right, it’s not fair. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this either but you do. Is today the day you let it beat you?’ Her answer is always no (followed by ‘but it still isn’t fair.’)
I can’t agree more about camps either – the education and confidence they provide has been invaluable to us! My T1 does day camp, and summer sleepover camp and we do family events as well.
Mandy Barnard says:
CAMP!!!! I’ve been T1 for 28 years and honestly, I had it easier because my mother is also T1, so there was someone close to me I could relate to. But she wasn’t my age and that makes a difference. I cannot say enough for what a diabetic camp can do for a T1 child who is struggling. I wasn’t struggling and it literally changed my life. I actually met my husband there (who’s is also T1) and our son was DX almost 4 years ago at 3 1/2. We will send him to camp when he is old enough.
So many people could take what you have all been through and sound just so bitter—–yours was a reflection in an upbeat manner; THANK YOU for that and for the valuable lesson. It is much appreciated.
My 17 year is going through this at the moment and has an hba1c higher than she had prior to diagnosis, We are paying privately for her to see a psychologist as we have reached an impasse and I feel that I am treading water to stay afloat. She is now back testing at least 3 times a day but I am finding it hard to trust her when she says she has. I feel clinic have been completely useless at supporting her or us as a family. My only advice is to hang in there and don’t give up and catch them when they fall
Thank you for your words of experience. If you are not, you should join the PEP Squad on FB—there YOU MIGHT find some of the support you need as well. If you have any questions….you can send them to my email and I’ll ask them if you want to stay anonymous. firstname.lastname@example.org
I do hope things get better. Thank you so much for caring enough to write.
I have a 13-year-old and a 15-year-old struggling with this. My 13-year-old has started seeing a counselor after a1cs of mid double digits. My 15-year-old is better but still has several days where he “forgets”. Our endo has told us that we need to let them learn. As a parent, I struggle between “helping remind” and “being controlling” as my son puts it. It’s hard to let go when they are hurting themselves.
As my dear (late) friend reminded me….always…..it is finding that balance.
Diabetes police is a badge we wear…….proudly. Because we must.