It has often been stated, and I have often chimed in the same, that when asked whether I would let my child with diabetes do something I answer, “would I have allowed it if diabetes was not in the picture?” That is the barometer on allowing what my child can strive to do.
Today I speak to you as a parent. When a child has a stomach virus, a cold, a fever, the flue, chicken pox, or whatever ailment would come their way; your life would be (and will be) miserable for the entire time they go through what they go through. Do you find yourself saying, when it is your child with diabetes, “…..them being sick now,is my fault too.”
Now if you add diabetes to the picture, you have to balance more and juggle more but always know that whatever ails your child will always take up the bulk of how miserable you would feel……even without diabetes.
Do not be afraid, to stop and ask yourself, would I have the same feelings (no matter what hey are) if my child was not also dealing with diabetes. You will be surprised at how many times you realize that whether you were dealing with diabetes or not, if your child feels crappy……..you will feel crappy too.
We are so quick to say that we feel a certain way because diabetes is on top of whatever else you are dealing with……..if your child, without diabetes, comes down with the chicken pox, you feel miserable too.
So give yourself a break. And don’t give diabetes any credit for anything. We are parents, we will always feel bad when our child becomes sick so allow yourself that feeling. I know, I know, it is tougher when diabetes is in the mix…..I TOTALLY get that; but just know if they seem like they are sick more often it is not because of anything you are doing wrong. Just know what it is, call it what it is, and deal with it.
You blame yourself enough, for so many other things out of your control, like their A1C; that gets enough of your self-guilt. You are the perfect parent for your child at this point in time. Know that.
I am a diabetes dad.
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