Of course there is no science to this and I may be way off base; but did you ever think that if anyone was to get diabetes; the correct child to get it…..got it. I mean no one ever really talks about this and I’m never one to be shy on matters no one talks about; but have you ever asked this question? I know, it’ a ‘taboo’ thought…..but honestly have you thought it, ever?
Now there are a few possible answers for this. Yes. No…….or……is it the fact that the child who was diagnosed with diabetes, and has been dealing with it for so long, that they just ‘shaped themselves’ around the fact that they have it and they dealt with it so well that they adjusted accordingly?
I’m not sure. I hate that any of them have it; but I HAVE BEEN guilty of holding that discussion with myself.
I do remember saying that if any of our children were to be diagnosed, Kaitlyn’s temperament and personality would be such, that she would be the one to handle it best. SO in retrospect, we were thankful that IF ANYONE was to get diabetes, the one who could handle it best is the one that got it…………..right?
Well, not so fast.
Because we were so good with the first one that whoever/whatever you believe in; God, fate, laws of nature decided to ‘bless’ us with the second diagnosis. Do I now say that if anyone was to get it, the correct two got it?
No thanks——I’m done.
My point is that in as much as we think ‘the right child’ was diagnosed; it may not necessarily be the case that there is only one answer to this thought.
Rob and Kaitlyn handle their diabetes completely differently. But both have tackled what they need to tackle in a way that is best for them……and it works. For that I’m grateful because at the end of the day it is managed to the best of their abilities SO THEY have as GREAT a life as possible and feel as good as they can to continue in this wonderful life…..THAT is what matters.
They are both (as my oldest is also) striving to do what will make them happy, what they want to do, and they are moving forward at a pace that is exciting to witness from the ‘parents gallery’.
So if you think ‘the right child’ is the one to have been diagnosed with diabetes……..I’m here to tell you that when tested, your kids will surprise you……..I know mine did……….and with all my heart and soul it is my absolute profound wish that you are not ever shown this fact as we (and others) were; with multiple diagnosed!!!!
I am a diabetes dad.
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6 replies on “My Kids…..”If Anyone was to Get Diabetes, the Right One Did.” Really?????”
Wow, Tom. You stated what my husband and I have thought for 29 year. I know our children’s personalities influenced how one handled having T1D and how his brother handled taking care of him in critical situations. One brother knowing he saved his brother’s life and the other grateful that his brother saved his life has created a remarkable bond between are son when they were boys and has continued into their adult lives.
Yes, it’s a whole new question when two kids are diagnosed. Both my kids have diabetes, and I do, too. We all handle it differently, and bring our own strengths to the table when dealing with it.
My kids were diagnosed within weeks of each other, so I never had to grapple with this question–thankfully. And now, i don’t want either if them to have it, of course.
This is a real question, sad as it seems. When I was a child, and my mother was diabetic (back then, losing eye sight, limbs, strokes, kidney failure were common) I remeber praying to “a god” and asking him to give me diabetes, not my brothers, because I thought I would handle it better than they could and I wanted to spare them.
What can I say? I have regretted that prayer. I have wondered how free my life could be if one of my brothers got it instead. I don’t want this damn disease. My heart aches for my kids (when they aren’t looking, because I need to be strong for them). My mother died from complications before they were born, and I have to believe that they won’t suffer like she did because science is changing they way we deal with it.
It is exhausting, there is no break from this disease–EVER! I wouldn’t ever want to question if the “right child” got this disease. I don’t want either of them to have it.
Thanks for this post 🙂
No….thank you for your incredible honesty.
My husband and I have both been guilty of saying this our T1d child is responsible and mature beyond her years even at the age of seven when she was diagnosed. She’s always eating healthier and better at making choices. Our younger one who is non-diabetic eat candy and junk and we can’t sway her from these delicious treats.
It is always a battle……and a balance. Always and in all ways
Truth in our house–is they both ‘have it’ in different ways. My son, dx at age 6, PHYSICALLY has it, but my daughter, age 8 when her brother was dx, EMOTIONALLY has it. She learned right by his side how to give shots, check glucose, count carbs, and all the rest.She worries, watches out for him, and goes to his endo appointments–all because she wants to-not because she has to. It is a disease that strikes all–even those not taking the shots. As we are now entering the teenage years–they fight, they take each others stuff, all the usual–but when it comes to diabetes–they are always a united front.