Tag: Daytona

If you are waiting on diabetes to have a ‘good’ day, you may be waiting a long, long time.  Over the years I have heard and/or read some of the following:
“I sure hope diabetes behaves today.”
“I hope diabetes gives me a break.”
“Diabetes better be nice today.”
……..it won’t.

Diabetes is a beast.  It takes what it wants, when it wants.  As in anything like this, the only way to have any peace is to do everything you can to tame the beast and the ONLY way to do that is with education.  I have heard people say that they get annoyed when it is stated that you need to own this disease, “You can’t possibly own it, why do people say that?”  Totally? No, you can’t.

I had a friend, recently, who became very, very sick.  The doctors said that if he was not in as good a shape as he was, the outcome could have been completely different.  The absolute perfect picture of health, but still he was stricken and hospitalized.  He could only do what he could do in life, after that, there is no control.  What is control is that he was in great shape, it may have saved his life.

Diabetes is still going to throw curveballs to anyone who has it.  It’s the nature of the beast, BUT how much are you leaving for chance and how much do you KNOW is the question you need to ask yourself and only you can answer.  Is the care you are giving your child being rocked by every little ripple that diabetes throws daily, or have you educated yourself enough to know as much as you can……..and then learn even more?

Does your child have the best management tools that your finances can afford? Have you asked a million questions so you know everything that will happen based on carb consumption vs. insulin distribution?  Are you guessing?

Diabetes is a very difficult disease to understand.  And even after you do everything you can, you still are going to be thrown for a loop.  But how much work have you done?  Even those who ‘master diabetes’ still have days that are very, very tough.  So if you are just relying on any given day for diabetes to treat you well, you may be waiting for a long time.  If you are taking diabetes on with a fully educated arsenal of knowledge; you will be ‘luckier’ than others.  The harder you work at it, the ‘luckier’ you will be.

Diabetes takes a lot of work…….and even then; some bad days will lay ahead.  How hard are you working at it?  Because even when you work at it…….really work at it, there is still hoping for a good day………..involved.

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’.

In life, many things are not as you would think.  The signs may point to one thing, but once you are ‘through the gate’ you find that it is something else altogether.

I am contacted a lot about insurance companies.  What is covered, what is not covered.  Why are they so difficult to speak to?  Why don’t they cover everything?  Why did they used to cover XYZ and now they only cover ABC?  Let’s get together and ‘get’ the insurance companies to do THIS or THAT; who is with me?

Uhmmmmmmmm………wait………no.

The first thing you must understand about insurance companies is that they are a business.  Business has one objective at the top of their pyramid….to make money.  Make money for themselves, make money for their stock holders, whatever.  I learned a valuable lesson a long time ago.  There was a woman who worked part-time.  Her company only covered full-time employees.  When she inquired as to why they did not allow part timers to ‘buy in’ to the full timers policy, she was told it was not an option.  The why, she later found out, was the ones asking for it—are the ones who wanted it—for a reason.  Why would an insurance company encourage a liability on their dockets if they do not need to?

Some people believe that insurance companies are a service organization, they are not.  That is not a bad thing, but it’s something you need to realize and understand.

If you have a child with T1 diabetes (or any chronic disease) on your insurance, the insurance company automatically knows they will probably lose money on your family.  THAT is not a good thing for them.  Because of all sorts of rules, laws, and regulations, insurance companies have to add you if the rest of the employees are being covered.  They will learn pretty quickly that you are not one that they will earn a profit.

Now look at this differently.  If there are two million people with T1 diabetes, insurance companies need to work for less damage to their bottom line.  They know they must pay out to cover you.  But let’s say they pay less for you and you have to shell out an additional $100 a year from you, and they save $100 per person by other means—–they just saved 400 million dollars.  Get it?

It’s a numbers game.

So when you call them, you have to know in your mind that they will be doing something to save money.  It’s your job to know what your insurance covers and how to ‘counter’ when they push-back on something you need.  Know the process to appeal any decision that you know is needed.  Know that ‘X’ which is a different brand name from your ‘Y’ may be something you need to live with if you want it covered by your insurance.

I’m not sure if this is a way to wear you down, but the more amount of steps you need to rectify something, or the more amount of calls you have to make, or the more amount of paperwork you have…….the more likely you will ‘give-in’ and just do it any way that is easiest………..my advice on that………………don’t.  I never speak to someone who has to go to someone else for an answer.  Ask for a supervisor.  Ask what can you do to change the ‘no’ into a ‘yes’.

‘Let me see’, or ‘let me check’, or ‘maybe’ are all phrases you want to hear……you do not go from a ‘no’ to a ‘yes’ without passing through one of these phrases.  Also know there is no such thing as a quick call to the insurance company.  Call when you have a good deal of time to spend to solve the problem.  Take down notes; who you spoke to, the date, the time and what was said.  And NEVER hang up until you ask; “Who should I speak to next to help me resolve this?” If they say they don’t know, ask to speak to someone else there in a supervisory position who can advise you where to go next.  DO NOT LET THEM OFF THE HOOK.

The other thing about being a business is that they want customers satisfied.  There is a difference between strong and rude; inquisitive and challenging; and making them your partner to achieve a correct solution………but know how it is all played out.  Also know that the answer may indeed be a ‘no’.  If you exhaust every avenue, appeal, and inquiry—know that what you are asking is JUST NOT possible.

But always be willing to give it a good and educated shot.  So although things may not always be as they seem, we also do not have to merely accept the answer without a good and detailed discussion on doing what is right for your family.  Our best insurance, is our willingness to ‘work the system’.  The best way to know that, is to do it.

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’.

 Do you hear people differently now that you have a child with diabetes?  How many times in the day do people say, “how are you?”

DO they really mean, how are you?  Do they really want to hear how we are?  Is it ‘new language’ for just plain everyday, “Hi”?  If everything is fine, the quick answer of ‘Ok’ or ‘Fine’ allows the conversation to continue seamlessly.   But what if you answer what really is going on?  What if you tell them who died, who is sick, who lost a job; well, honestly, are they really asking for the rundown in your life?

Some people really WANT TO KNOW how you are, they really do.  But in most case, I believe, it is a courtesy.  It can be the same thing when asked how your child with diabetes is, right?

“How is XYZ doing with their diabetes?”

Do most people really want to know how they are doing, or are they asking hoping for some sort of ‘positive’ answer that will allow the conversation to continue?
“XYS is managing…..sometimes….”
“Good, glad everything is okay?  What did you guys do this weekend?”
Does this exchange sound familiar at all to you?

I have come to learn over the years, who I know who is REALLY asking how my kids are doing and who is asking as if checking in on a weather report. Sunny? Great.  Cloudy? Okay.  Storm? Don’t want to hear it.

It used to frustrate me until I started taking mental notes on who was asking, REALLY ASKING; and who really is not asking but wants to be courteous.  It was also a very important lesson for me to learn as well.

I learned that I, at times, could be just as I now see others.  I really did not want to hear the whole story.  Perhaps it’s just human nature.  Perhaps we are too much in a hurry.  Perhaps we have our own problems and do not want to hear about someone else’s mess.  It was a hard lesson learned,  Now when I ask, I mean it.  If I cannot spend the time, I do not ask.

Of course some people wait for the ask so they can unload every problem under the sun to you.  That’s a tough call as well.  But for the most part when people ask, I answer and leave the closing of the sentence open-ended enough to answer questions, but closed enough that allows the person an out, if they ‘really’ do not want to hear more than ‘we are doing okay’.

And many times, the people who REALLY do not know, come up with the stupidest way to close the discussion.   It has taken me a long, long time to let these comments just roll off me.   I don’t get angry anymore.
“They will grow out of it I’m sure.”
“They are just watching what they eat, I’m sure.”
“You are used to it by now.”
“Two kids now, well good thing you had the first one, now you are experts.”
“Must be easier that one is out of the house.”
……………….and on……and on…….and on……and on.

So let it roll off you too.  Learn now what took me years to do because it just does not get better.   People will say what they want to say to make themselves feel at easy……and that’s okay.  Just recognize it for what it is the next time you hear:
“Oh I know exactly, EXACTLY, what you are going through………………………my dog has diabetes.”

I am a diabetes dad.

Please visit my Diabetes Dad FB Page and hit ‘like’.