life – DiabetesDad

On What Do You Lean? Please Share.

Posted on January 27, 2013 | by tomkarlya | 5 Comments

Well if anyone can handle this, you guys can. Really? I have always wanted to punch in the nose whoever said those words to me; and every time I heard them. I do believe I would be left with many less friends though, so I refrain. We heard the words a lot over the years but more than I could handle after Rob was diagnosed.

I have never for one second believed that statement as I believe the roadway on the new normal is much to do with a ‘learn-as-you-go’ journey.

What I do believe, however, is there is something in us that we have that helps us greatly on this journey and that is what I want to address today. Something we always had, that when needed, it was already there ready for use. In our house it was a few things and I can pinpoint them immediately.

We have always lived with the notion that music and laughter must be in our house. Almost every morning, the first thing we do is turn on the radio so music plays all day long. My dad used to do that every day; I grew up with the sounds of Glen Miller and all of the great golden era music; and Jill’s house also did the same. During the holidays each of us has our own favorite song; and we each know them.

We also love to laugh. Not at someone’s expense as much as we all just look at things in a manner that is a little weird that makes us laugh. Someone will say, or do, something that we all find so funny; we do enjoy each other and when all of us are together, one thing is a sure bet; we will laugh. We all have a unique way of looking at things, and sometimes pretty twisted as well.

Whether it is a play on words, or buying someone 48 boxes of pop tarts because you bought them a toaster, ‘and well they need something to put in the toaster’, or a funny thing shared from the internet–we just love to laugh in our house; and we do.

We have tried to make sure both music and laughter stayed even with everything life has thrown at us. I have often said that laughter is the ballet of life. Master it and you can get through anything. Music is the baseline for which we walk, walk with a little beat in your steps and the traveling load will be that much lighter.

What do you use in your ‘new normal’ that you are so grateful was part of your life before that you lean on often. Life is an amazing journey; sometimes there is MUCH thrown at us. During those times, what do you rely on to help? Please let us know as you might be helping someone else.

I am a diabetes dad.

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This Christmas…..We Welcomed Back the ‘New Normal’.

Posted on December 26, 2012 | by tomkarlya | 1 Comment

It was a great Christmas. It’s quiet in my house as I write today; much-needed rest for everyone. I’m not sure if it is the joy of having a newly engaged couple in the house or the anticipation of good news or just having everyone around with ‘our new normal’.

We have had so many years under our belts with diabetes and we have learned to adapt; even when our second was diagnosed; we kept adapting. Our base line (when I say our; I mean all those who live with diabetes or a loved one with diabetes) is different from most.

Life gives us so much to deal with that I never thought I would ever say ‘please just let us handle diabetes’ for a little while. I hate dealing with that also but with everything we have been through over the past few years, it was nice to have just the ‘new normal’ back again. We do not really lay it ALL out there……some we do but not all. Some people know, others do not need to know. I have written before, it is life. Life has been a little cruel over the last few years to us.

Many people have had life throw them major curves also. So unfair.

On of my favorite stories is to tell a lesson I learned from my mother-in-law who I loved dearly and one we lost this year, sadly. My father-in-law, her husband, died in September 1999 just one week prior to a walkathon major event that we had participated in for years. The day after his funeral she called me and the conversation went something like this:
“Hello Dear, what time do you want us at the walk?”
“The walk?”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure you want to do it this year?”
Silence.
“Tom, life is for the living. Pain can stay, but we must move on or the pain takes over. SO what time do you want me there and what should I bring?”

I miss my mother-in-law she was the definition of class and she blessed our lives for many years with ‘pearls of wisdom’ such as these. I called them lessons-in-life, she just called it conversation.

So this Christmas season was a lot of laughs and much fun and excitement. More so than in the last 3 or so years. I think we deserved that, even with the new normal, it’s time to move on. And we will, as many do.

I am a diabetesdad

A mad as hell tragedy…we can all help. Read, do, & share.

Posted on September 5, 2012 | by tomkarlya | 2 Comments

It’s not enough. You have to get mad; so mad that you do something.

Dammit I’m angry as hell. You get mad too. Please read.

Meri and Ryan Schuhmacher with their 4 young boys (teens and below in age) were just like any other couple; you, me, or even your friends and/or relatives, they’re a family. Meri is the type of woman who somehow always finds a blessed light in the darkness of things that happen in this world. She is a fabulous writer and her “OurDiabeticLife.com” is about as refreshing and real as it gets.

Did I forget to tell you that 3 of her 4 boys also live with T1 diabetes every day? Figure it this way 24/7/365X3.

Six months ago she revealed to the world that her husband would be battling a rare form of brain cancer and to say the fight was valiant would be an understatement. With 3 kids living with type 1 diabetes, fighting valiantly is a way of life for the Schuhmacher Family.

I saw them in July and you could tell it was a struggle but Ryan had a smile to give and his family around him at the Children with Diabetes conference in Orlando Florida.

Ryan lost his battle over the weekend. Just like that, six months apart, total upheaval of a family. That should make me angry at life. That should make you angry too. Meri wouldn’t want that and truly, it’s not in my make up; but make no mistake—I’m real angry. I’m asking you to get angry too.

Diabetes, Cancer, MS, Alzheimer’s, Autism, and so many more diseases that strike a chord with one of us, or all of us, are always asking for money. Camps, hospices, hospitals, and educational institutions are all also constantly asking for money. And it is understandable, times are tough. Money is needed for extremely important issues.

Recently a woman was bullied on a bus and the world thought it was horrendous and raised $702,384 for this woman. That was fabulous.

This is horrendous also.
Think about this: a woman with 4 young boys and 3 of them with type one diabetes, and not only is the love of her life gone, but so is the family’s source of income. Meri must now ‘go it alone’. Medical bills from Ryan’s cancer battles, three boys with diabetes, daily living with a house and all that goes into running it and the food bills for 4 growing boys; plus so much more—-you get the picture.

A site that was started to help with Ryan’s medical bills is now the financial lifeboat for the Schuhmacher Family’s enormous expenses. Life has completely bullied Meri and I’m asking you to be angry right along with so many others and angry enough to care. Meri will move forward in life because….well….that is Meri. She is a proud woman and a great mother. We can impact the future of this family. Let’s do it……together.

http://www.giveforward.com/schuhmacherfamilymiracle2

By clicking the above link is a way every single cent will make a difference to a family in need, both now and for years to come. If you have $5, it will make a difference. If you can give more, please do so. Give because you are doing okay, give because your kids are okay, give because you want to see your money actually help a family and make a difference, give because that is what we all do when someone needs our help; this help is needed more than you will ever know. Please, give.

PLEASE–give today and share this blog somewhere else. We’re all God’s creatures, even when we’re mad as hell. Thank you. I’m a Diabetes Dad.